1. to do some... any kind of research on how to go around the "places of interest".... i wouldn't... or shouldn't rather.. depend on my travel mate.

2. to pack... lightly.

3. to wash off my ugly chipped nail polish. and paint it with yet another ugly colour.

4. to shave, pluck, trim....

5. to borrow a camera.

6. to print out accommodation booking.

7. to remind my travel mate to check in online. or else ditch her altogether.

8. ... more money!!!


fingers crossed no nature or humanly induced accidents. and we come back in one piece, sane, and not pissed off with each other.

all is last minute. i feel slightly dizzy and frankly, not used to making plans. but if there is no expectations, there will be no disappointments. hmmn... i do sound like a pessimistic lazy arse.

hope there will be good cheap food. cheap drinks. and free fireworks!

till then. happy new year!

脑子，空间有限。很多事情都装不下。很多回忆，渐渐流失。

2012 快要过了。新的一年，新的数字。想紧紧抓住的，却是旧的东西。

我还来不及呐喊，悲泣, 它们却已不经意的蒸发， 留下苦涩的滋味。

this was the second foreign film I've watched in the cinema. i think. the first was "Ponette". and a few of my unfortunate friends still hold me accountable for the "traumatic" experience.

recently, i've been exchanging and sharing some thoughts on foreign films with a colleague. and this movie popped up. i like the story, the settings and the music scores.

a beautiful piano score. "small happiness"

"let's meet before i leave."

"we will meet. i promise."

"i'll never see you again."

"never say never."

never say never. i don't know if it is just being optimistic, or it is something people say when they don't want to admit to the finality of things. because sometimes... never is... never.

there's always something better left unsaid. because saying them will not change a thing. because saying them will only show how hopeless the situation is. because saying them makes you cry. and sadness is useless.

is it so weak to show your tears? is your pride worth defending to not speak your mind? is it so feeble to say " i will miss you . i love you. and i don't want you to leave?" when you know that parting is inevitable... and words are futile.

affection comes and goes. life comes and goes. but as the earth shifts beneath you, the day passes you by, you do remember some words... and they meant something in that time and space.

just because they could have been left unsaid but they were not. they were spoken to mark the moment... and to signify an end.

it has reached a point in my life that i'm eating my own words.

it's not a good feeling. but then again. i am not the person i was before. and i am not going to be the same in let's say, a year later. well, i might not even be here.

so, push aside your pride, for you are only trying to learn and live and love. mistakes, blunders, failures... they are hard to face and plough through. but they will definitely not be something you are ashamed off when the time comes.

you see yourself in them, these so-called experiences, how naive you were, how convinced you were, how stupid, how young... you will never be the same.

but then as you look back. you always. always missed the way you were back then.