this morning i woke up to a dreadful daze.... laying on the bed for a good 5 minutes... thinking that it's Saturday.... good. i can go back to sleep.... NOooo... something's off... oh nooooo... it's Friday.... i still have to wake up....for the life of me... i just couldn't wake up.... until i realized it's Thursday....

it's f8cking just Thursday.

it doesn't taste so bitter anymore. it doesn't.... u know... after a few gulps of fermented sugar and starch.

the more important part... is that... it doesn't feel so heavy anymore. in fact, i feel lighter. as if someone is blowing wind into my head. and i am twirling, spinning so gayly such... that i don't feel bad at all. at all.

now before it gets old. before people grew tired of me. before i grew tired of me. so let's draw the curtains down. and stare into the darkness...

买了一件有脱线的围巾给朋友。买了一件有脱线的毛织衣给自己。嗯。也不知为什么。不再执着了。

生活工作得过且过。留点空间给自己，累了，歇一下。烦了，呆一下。退一步，没有海阔天空，却也算还站着， 没有倒下。

这。。。也算是一种坚持吧。

it's great to sleep in the whole saturday. it's great to feel the familiar dent in your mattress that cradles your body so well. and that soothing but slightly sour smell of your cover... and if not for that horrible jamming construction noise 6 metres away from my ears.... i would have hibernated. happily.

the trip was good. i made a conscious decision to be away for the turn of the year. and i did. so it was good.

countdown was as crowded, as sweaty, as uncomfortable, as one could have expected. but i wanted to do it. the fireworks were not that impressive. the atmosphere was not as chaotic. no foam sprays thank goodness. and for the first time, i held up the camera and shamelessly clicking away, capturing more photos than necessarily, even filming a good 3 minutes of the fireworks. only to have it deleted accidentally later on. it's not something i would re-watch again. but  i would like to keep the video as a memento -- for the after-show 1.5 hours --  stuck in human sea trying to squeeze into the skytrain station.

would i do it again? hell ya! :) but it really helps if it's in the winter. for the squeezing part.

so let this year be safe and sound. just so i could make it to 2014 countdown! there might not be much to look forward to for pessimist such as moi. but among the resolutions this year... yes. CELEBRATE. celebrate with a smile, or a tear. JUST. celebrate. :)

1. to do some... any kind of research on how to go around the "places of interest".... i wouldn't... or shouldn't rather.. depend on my travel mate.

2. to pack... lightly.

3. to wash off my ugly chipped nail polish. and paint it with yet another ugly colour.

4. to shave, pluck, trim....

5. to borrow a camera.

6. to print out accommodation booking.

7. to remind my travel mate to check in online. or else ditch her altogether.

8. ... more money!!!


fingers crossed no nature or humanly induced accidents. and we come back in one piece, sane, and not pissed off with each other.

all is last minute. i feel slightly dizzy and frankly, not used to making plans. but if there is no expectations, there will be no disappointments. hmmn... i do sound like a pessimistic lazy arse.

hope there will be good cheap food. cheap drinks. and free fireworks!

till then. happy new year!